This photo is dedicated to Eliot Spitzer, star of the new NYP series Mr. Clean keeps it polished, in which we find out that Client #9 sometimes asked his lady friends “to do things that, like, you might not think were safe.” Keep the press free and yellow!

It’s not dedicated to Geneive Abdo though (yeah, I’ve finally gotten around to chewing through No God But You Know Who), who claims that Muslims are nice people and that good girls like to put on veils because it gives them a sense of identity. My favorite line so far? “He had always resisted the forces of the state, first as a drug dealer and then as a street preacher.” Leaving aside the obviously unforgivable peddling of noxious substances on street corners and considering for a moment his earlier career as a purveyor of exotic herbs: to whit, selling hash in Imbaba. A useful service? Certainly. Profitable? Possibly. But “resisting the forces of the state”? Earth to Space Station Conceptual Over-reach, Earth to Space Station Conceptual Over-reach, your pretension inhibitor is malfunctioning…

Meanwhile, the Egypt State Information Service declares that in “modern times, the world has derived from Egypt the institutions and modern administrative systems as well as the formulas of constitution, parliament, responsible government and judicial authority…” Apparently the internal combustion engine and heavier than air flight were also developed in a workshop in Shobra and Pharoanic scientists based in Thebes invented kidneys, the process of inhalation and gravity. What a load of crap. Some USAID hack got a nice wad of USDs in their back pocket from a project to “increase transparency in democratic practice and good governance” for writing that bullshit, so what the hell. Who am I to stab a fellow pro in the pay packet?